Nightmares
by Lashana Inferno
Summary: Tvashtar's brave facade concerning his past finally breaks and only Lashana can pull him out of it. Songfic.


_Lashana and Telca own only themselves, Tvashtar, Kadrith, the three dragons and Telca's cat. Every other character belongs to someone that isn't us._

_The song is 'Crash and Burn' by SavageGarden._

Nightmare

"'Shana? 'Shana, wake up."

"Nn!" Annoyed at being pulled out of what was actually a rather nice dream, Lashana irritably swatted at the hands that were shaking her shoulders before grabbing the blankets and pulling them over her head, moaning when the hands pulled the warmth away and cupped her face. 

"Lashana?"

She grumbled and cracked an eye open to stare up at her Bonded in the darkness of their room, wondering why he was wide awake at Gods only knew how early it was and why he felt that he had to wake her up as well. "Wha?" She fell silent moments later as her hearing picked up muffled sounds of distress, and she frowned as Black slowly pulled away and propped himself up on an elbow next to her, looking at her quietly.

"It's Tvashtar," Blackwargreymon whispered to her as he reached out to tuck a lock of her hair behind her right ear. "You should go."

Surprised, she turned to stare at him, wondering if perhaps he was sick or drunk. Had she heard him right? Was he actually letting her go comfort another male?

"Don't look at me like that," he rumbled, frowning at the look of shock on her face. "He's your brother, isn't he? Besides, you're the only one he fully trusts."

"H-hai... arigato..." It had become second habit now, to add various little tidbits of japanese into her sentences, and spicing things up with a bit of spanish every now and again. It was just another thing that he put up with, even when she switched languages so quickly that it confused him. "Demo... You're sure you don't mind?"

"Love, would I be telling you to go if I did?"

"Yes." 

"...okay. You have me there." Chuckling, he pulled her close and gave her a quick kiss before bodily lifting her from the bed and setting her on her feet. "Go on, love. It'd bother me more if I forced you to stay while knowing that you wanted to help him. Now, if it was _Kang..._"

She snickered and shook her head. "Alright, alright. I get the point. I'll be back in a bit."

The darkness hid his worried frown as she crept out the door, his keen hearing easily picking up the draconid's whimpers as the grip of whatever nightmare that was haunting him seemingly dug it's talons deeper into him. _No you won't. You and I both know that whatever's plaguing him.... it's as bad as my nightmares used to be._

~*~

_'Get away! Stop it! You're _**_hurting_**_ me!'_ Talons shredded at the mattress as Tvashtar thrashed, fighting against bonds that only chained him in his mind. Cruel laughter echoed in his dream as his worst memories broke through the mental walls he had put up to hold them at bay, forcing him to relive the time he had spent with Serenica, and the agony and torment and humiliation that she had exacted on him during those ten years.

_'Aww, is my pet unhappy? Heh, you'll learn to like this soon enough. Just stop fighting me.... stop fighting, and I can make this good for you.'_

_'Noo! Don't _**_touch_**_ me! _**_Don't!_** _L-Sama! Kadrith! Someone! Anyone, _**_help me!_**_'_

_'No one can help you, little pet. You're mine, and mine alone. And I'll _**_never_**_let you go... Never.'_

_'_**_NO!_**_'_

_When you feel all alone   
And the world has turned its back on you   
Give me a moment please to tame your wild wild heart   
I know that you feel like the walls are closing in on you   
It's hard to find relief and people can be so cold   
When darkness is upon your door and you feel like you can't take it anymore _

Lashana paled as she silently let herself into Tvashtar's room, her heart breaking at the sounds of his terrified whimpers and the sight of his tears. Shutting the door behind herself, she slowly approached him, wary of his talons as he lashed out at an unseen adversary, succeeding only in getting himself even more tangled up in the blankets and making his struggles even more desperate. In the dim light from the moon, she could see that he was covered in a light sheen of sweat, his hair tangled and damp from his own tears as he shuddered and moaned. "Tvashtar! Tvashtar, wake up!"

When it seemed that the sound of her voice only terrified him all the more, she leapt onto the bed and straddled his waist, pinning his arms when he accidentally raked himself across the chest with his talons, leaving five parallel cuts behind as his movements became more violent, as if he was struggling with someone.... or something. Unfortunately, she had underestimated his strength, and she yelped as he jerked an arm free, his right hand lashing out, talons digging deep into her cheek before she grit her teeth and gave him a solid upper cut to his jaw, jolting him out of his dream.

The blow knocked his head to the side, his horns leaving gouges in the bed's headboard. All the tension seemed to drain from him then to be replaced by a soul-deep weariness, and she heaved her own strangled sigh as she stared down at him, feeling his heart thundering against his ribs as she let herself collapse onto him from exhaustion.

It was a long five minutes before she heard his breathing change, knowing that he was struggling to calm himself, and she stroked his cheek a little as she rose her head from his shoulder to look at him, frowning when he flinched from the touch before he took a breath of the air, relaxing as soon as he recognised her scent.

"Kelestra? W-what.... what are you doing here?"

"You were having a nightmare.... I didn't know what else to do...."

Slowly, he rose a trembling hand to his aching jaw, then snapped his eyes open and stared at her. "Y-you _hit _me!" Before she could answer, he gasped and rose a hand to her cheek, lightly tracing the deep cut there with a soft moan of despair. "I hurt you.... Ooohhh, Kelestra...." 

_Let me be the one you call   
If you jump I'll break your fall   
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night   
If you need to fall apart   
I can mend a broken heart   
If you need to crash then crash and burn   
You're not alone _

Lashana felt a wave of worry wash over her as he locked his arms around her and buried his face in her hair, his tears trickling down her neck as he sobbed against her. _Sweet lords of the forest.... what was that nightmare about?!_ Moving carefully, she slowly coaxed him to roll onto his side, enabling her to cradle him against her as he cried, his arms tightening around her as if he was afraid she'd vanish. "Tvashtar. Tvashtar, it's alright. Everything's okay. I'm sorry I hit you, bro. Really."

A shudder wracked him when she called him 'bro', and he trembled as he clung to her. Unable to calm himself enough to speak, he took one of her hands and lowered it to his outer thigh, feeling her tense a little before she gasped, feeling the old ragged scar that ran from his waist down to his left knee, his naturally dark colouring hiding the mark from plain view.

"W-what...." She struggled with her own emotions, sifting through rage and horror before settling on shock. "This.... this is from...."

"Serenica," he whispered, his voice ragged. "She was in my nightmare."

"Tell me."

He shook his head, refusing to look at her. "....I can't."

"Tvashtar...."

"I _can't!_"

_When you feel all alone   
And a loyal friend is hard to find   
You're caught in a one way street   
With the monsters in your head   
When hopes and dreams are far away and   
You feel you can't face the day_

Frowning, she gripped his shoulders and forcably pushed him back. "Then you're letting her win! She'll torment you from the grave forever until you confront this! I don't want to lose you to some bitch that's already dead, Tvashtar! But if you don't get tell me what she did to you and let me help you, then that's exactly what's going to happen!" When he didn't say anything, she narrowed her eyes and played the only trump card that she had. "I order you to tell me, Guardian of Chaos."

_That_ got a reaction, though not the one she was expecting. 

Snarling, he shoved her away and lunged to his feet, tail lashing as he glared at her, his fear and frustration lashing out at the only target it had. "That's it? The moment I don't do what you want, you order me to do it, no matter what it does to me in the process?! You're not any different! _You're just like her!_" 

The moment those words left his lips he immediately regretted them, falling silent as Lashana jerked as if he had physically hit her. His anger drained away from him as quickly as it had come, and he moaned as he sank to the floor, his hands limp in his lap as tears welled up in his eyes. "....Kelestra.... I'm sorry.... I didn't mean...."

She sighed and slowly got off the bed, seeing a shiver go through him as she walked over to him and knelt in front of him. "Tvashtar, all I want is for you to be happy. If you don't want to tell me, then you don't have to. But then you're going to have to tell me what to do, because I can't just sit here and watch this destroy you, I don't want to see you in pain.... it hurts me."

"I don't want you to hate me."

_Let me be the one you call   
If you jump I'll break your fall   
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night   
If you need to fall apart   
I can mend a broken heart   
If you need to crash then crash and burn   
You're not alone _

"Why would I hate you?" Moving slowly so as not to startle him, she shifted so that she was kneeling a little to the side of him and gently curled her arms around him, feeling him tremble as he returned the embrace. "I could never hate you."

"But she--"

"You're not responsible for the evils of another."

"....I tried to get away, Kelestra. I really did, and I _couldn't_, and she hurt me _so much_...."

The ragged whisper tore at her, and she closed her eyes to stop her own tears as she held him tighter, letting him cry to his heart's content. Over the next hour, he alternated between telling her about the ten years under Serenica's rule and breaking down into soul wracked sobs. Through it all she said nothing. Instead, she merely held him to her and gently rocked back and forth, trying to reassure him the only way she was capable of at the moment. She had a feeling that it was a good thing he refused to meet her gaze, surely the rage that was building inside her was visible there.

_Because there has always been heartache and pain   
And when it's over you'll breathe again   
You'll breathe again _

It was nearly dawn when Tvashtar's sobs finally lessened, and he hiccuped for breath for a moment before slowly forcing his eyes open, tensing when he saw that Lashana's hair had changed from white to gold. A little wary, he rose his head to look at her and felt something inside him break at the sight of bright tears in her golden eyes, the tender look she was giving him a complete contrast to the anger that had brought about her transformation.

Sighing softly, Lashana rose a hand to his left cheek and mustered up a weak smile. "_Onooro._"

_When you feel all alone   
And the world has turned its back on you   
Give me a moment please   
To tame your wild wild heart _

He sniffled at the sound of the melodious word and let her wipe the remainder of his tears away. "What does that mean?"

"'My brother'. At least I hope so, my High Elvish is a little rusty."

A weak chuckle left him as he hugged her again, feeling her arms slide around his neck to return the embrace. "Thank you.... Kelestra. I.... I don't know what I would have done without you."

_Let me be the one you call   
If you jump I'll break your fall   
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night   
If you need to fall apart   
I can mend a broken heart   
If you need to crash then crash and burn   
You're not alone_

"Anytime, _onooro_. Anytime."


End file.
